If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize