Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
