so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
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my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
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Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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