bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
