Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
