Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (909): View more from California

  I just didn't expect you to be so naked....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (909): I just didn't expect you to be so naked.... http://tfl.nu/rjbc
  Replies (7) Good night (3451) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store. http://tfl.nu/3zcn
  Replies (17) Good night (728) Bad night (2152)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them http://tfl.nu/fxji
  Replies (37) Good night (825) Bad night (3797)
• Favorite

  (347): View more from New York

  We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (347): We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job http://tfl.nu/wtkj
  Replies (18) Good night (680) Bad night (4351)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (806): How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking. http://tfl.nu/9w1c
  Replies (11) Good night (4040) Bad night (708)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wow. You named your rash.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch. (717): Wow. You named your rash. http://tfl.nu/cxl6
  Replies (22) Good night (805) Bad night (3945)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis." http://tfl.nu/rkkz
  Replies (10) Good night (920) Bad night (3103)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick. http://tfl.nu/gzhw
  Replies (15) Good night (4596) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel http://tfl.nu/4p3k
  Replies (6) Good night (3025) Bad night (1153)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".

  (416): View more from Toronto

  That's about an "8" on normal scales.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him". (416): That's about an "8" on normal scales. http://tfl.nu/joyf
  Replies (7) Good night (2704) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!! (860): I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo http://tfl.nu/vjys
  Replies (14) Good night (8402) Bad night (963)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook http://tfl.nu/xr9p
  Replies (15) Good night (2985) Bad night (1074)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it. http://tfl.nu/gqru
  Replies (4) Good night (719) Bad night (439)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (606): Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any http://tfl.nu/tvgl
  Replies (3) Good night (957) Bad night (477)
• Favorite

  (669): View more from California

  And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (669): And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach http://tfl.nu/x5nk
  Replies (8) Good night (863) Bad night (355)

Randomize