Texts From Last Night

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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.

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  (918): After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again. http://tfl.nu/cy0p
  Replies (141) Good night (643) Bad night (6213)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.

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  (305): nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex. http://tfl.nu/huzf
  Replies (6) Good night (1520) Bad night (4359)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding

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  (847): i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding http://tfl.nu/srhr
  Replies (12) Good night (5461) Bad night (681)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me

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  (321): i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me http://tfl.nu/5b8j
  Replies (10) Good night (3103) Bad night (1052)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.

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  (803): He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face. http://tfl.nu/7qv4
  Replies (21) Good night (1365) Bad night (5415)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.

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  (845): Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there. http://tfl.nu/s3qt
  Replies (22) Good night (4035) Bad night (993)
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  (239): View more from Florida

  Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.

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  (239): Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America. http://tfl.nu/e8n4
  Replies (3) Good night (1607) Bad night (869)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..

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  (519): I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow.. http://tfl.nu/bd79
  Replies (15) Good night (1823) Bad night (780)
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  (619): View more from California

  I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"

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  (619): I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn" http://tfl.nu/h75w
  Replies (5) Good night (1444) Bad night (573)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.

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  (250): WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME. http://tfl.nu/12ba
  Replies (7) Good night (633) Bad night (1411)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick

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  (570): I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick http://tfl.nu/k83b
  Replies (3) Good night (572) Bad night (446)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.

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  (+61): First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost. http://tfl.nu/c1qe
  Replies (5) Good night (511) Bad night (808)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.

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  (678): Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty. http://tfl.nu/d492
  Replies (5) Good night (815) Bad night (412)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..

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  (732): Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say.. http://tfl.nu/7n6y
  Replies (3) Good night (509) Bad night (257)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.

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  (208): Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering. http://tfl.nu/ya1u
  Replies (5) Good night (885) Bad night (411)

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