considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son