believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
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He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
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three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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