it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
