I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
