it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
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he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
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He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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