And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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