dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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