All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
In America we eat man semen.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Randomize
