My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
