some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Naked Twister starts at high noon
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize