i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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