I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
