ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
he's gonorrhea incarnate
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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