I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize