Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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