how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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