Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
