That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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