please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Randomize
