I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize