Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
