I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Terrible idea I love it
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
