She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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