is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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