he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Randomize
