I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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