i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
