its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
