you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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