these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
