I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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