Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize