I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
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