I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
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