Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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