i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize