I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize