u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
