Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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