i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
