and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I showed him my bush... on skype.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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