suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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