the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
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