She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
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