have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
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